Children are the future...

Oh. My. God. If you’ve ever beaten yourself up for blowing an interview, take heart. There is no way you could have blown it this badly. Please witness Miss South Carolina Lauren Caitlin Upton explaining why a fifth of Americans can’t even find America on a world map during this past weekend’s Miss Teen USA Pageant. The most frightening thing? She finished third-runner up. That means out of 51 total contestants, there were 47 other girls even worse than her. You’re looking at the future of “U.S. Americans” here, people. Weep for our country, cause we’re doomed.