Gender Fuck Thursday

Mmmm, tasty, tasty androgyny. I’ve always been a sucker for a lady in a suit. The blending of the traditionally masculine and the wonderfully feminine is just, well, yum. And the blurrier the lines (hello, Tilda Swinton, come sit closer to me) often the better. But it’s more than just the look; it’s also the swagger. Thumbs in pockets. Shoulders squared. Jaw set. How quickly can that lead to jacket on floor? Shirt crumpled. Skin sweaty… Wait…where was I? Oh, yeah. Fuck yeah, gender fuck. [Click any and all to enlarge.]

Natalie PortmanSigourney WeaverKate BeckinsaleAlicia KeysSamantha RonsonKelly ClarksonAlicia Silverstone

Just another happy couple

So Lindsay Lohan is gay. And so is Clay Aiken. That sound you're hearing is the universe letting out a collective “Duh!” But, then, this week's admissions – both casual and on covers – is another reminder of the power that those words still have. Sure, we all knew. Heck, I'm sure most of our grandmas knew. But once you say those words out loud, it takes away the whispers. It takes away the alleged. It takes away all that is seemingly suspect. It's just fact now, just life, and life goes on.

Admittedly, Lindsay's coming out process has been the most fascinating to watch. Having one of America's hottest starlets potentially be part of a lesbian relationship was like fresh carrion to the gossip vultures. But that's not what made it fascinating. Nor was it because of her status among the paparazzi princesses who crashed and burned to a chorus of flashbulbs. No, what made it fascinating is that her experience seems to mirror that of so many young gay or questioning women today.

Lindsay found someone she liked. That someone happened to be a girl. So they started hanging out together and going everywhere together. And soon they were just together. And they never hid it. Sure, they never confirmed it until this week either. But there they were shopping together and traveling together and attending parties together and working together. They held hands. They cuddled. They kissed. They were out without being out.

Then earlier this week while calling into Loveline to talk about their friend DJ AM's plane crash, they finally confirmed what all our eyes already saw:

DJ: Now, you guys, you and Samantha have been going out for how long now?
Lindsay: (laughter)
DJ: Like two years? One year? Five months? Two months?
Lindsay: A long...a very long time.
DJ: Well good, well I hope you guys stay together. You are a very lovely looking couple.
Lindsay: Thank you very much.

I haven't always been a fan of Lindsay's. Actually, I was a fan of hers before I wasn't a fan of hers (call it my inner John Kerry). While I'll never support the vapid excess that led to her reckless behavior, I'll be the first to applaud her for pulling herself together and not squandering her talent. And talent she has, the real deal. Just re-watch “Mean Girls,” trust me. So it's unfair to lump her in with the famous for being famous Paris-Kim-Nicole set.

Yet with that simple confirmation Lindsay has hopefully forever closed the door on the last bit of so-called salaciousness in her life. It's only fun to gossip about rumors. Facts, well, they take all the naughtiness out of the equation. Ellen and Portia go to the supermarket and the movies and the car wash together all the time. But while the paparazzi still follow them, you don't see them splashed across on the gossip sites every day. They're old news – just another boring happy couple. And, now, maybe Lindsay and Samantha are one, too. Gosh, wouldn't that be refreshing.

That’s Mrs. Ronson to you

This is so dumb, I can’t believe I’m writing about it. Now I really feel like one of the blogging sheep. Watch me join the herd: “Bah-bah, Lindsay’s bah lesbian bah love bah letters bah-bah!” The latest on the formerly adorable red-head is that while in rehab she sent her rumored girlfriend out DJ Samantha Ronson love notes via MySpace. Given Lindsay’s clear lack of boundaries, she of course gave 75 of her closest “friends” access to her private page and one of those “friends” leaked the messages to the tabs. And, voila, one of these supposed notes to Samantha sufaces:

“Babe, if I don’t have you in my life then I should just go die…I want to marry you and have children with you...
Go to bed babe, I love you.
[signed] -Lindsay Ronson.”

You know what? I hope they really are a couple. I hope she is in love. And I hope Samantha loves her back. Hell, why not? In fact, good for them. Of course, considering her newfound affinity for Machiavelli, that relationship could be headed for some serious dyke drama. Though I guess carrying around a copy of “The Prince” is better than totting about a new Bible by Prada.

Herbie Fully Lesbian

So, the latest totally unsubstantiated lesbian rumor making the rounds is that Lindsay Lohan and her DJ friend Samantha Ronson are in a relationship. I am trying to decide if I care. On the one hand, OK, that’s fine and good for them. On the other hand, great, lesbianism is the new rehab -- all the starlets are trying it. Ugh.

“She actually has always been quite open. I would love to name all the young Hollywood she has slept with, but I will keep that for the ‘book.’ Maybe she was tired of the boys and that is why she decided to spice it up with BFF Samantha Ronson.”

Of course, it should be noted that this “story” came from the blog of a former publicist who is writing a “book.” In the same entry he calls Carson Daly a smelly drunk, Mark McGrath a coke user and Da Brat a closeted lesbian. So, really, this post should come with the label: “WARNING: Celebrity gossip, please add salt.”