Fight through it

Hey, remember when I interviewed Zoie Palmer and she was lovely and charming and gracious and everything you’d ever hoped for? Me too! But, as I touched on ever so briefly in the interview, she’s also a bunch of other things. Funny, that’s one of them. But we all knew that already. But also badass. Yes, badass. Sure, on “Lost Girl” her skills are mostly confined to looking great in a lab coat and occasionally poking someone with a needle. But when she guested on “Nikita,” she got to show us some of her other skills. I know it’s probably wrong on every level, but watching Zoie and Maggie Q beat the shit out of each other is all kinds of hot. Hello, Monday. Now isn’t that a nice kick in the ass? Well, actually, the head.

p.s Reminder, I’m all “Lost Girl” all the time right now at AfterEllen. Season 2 SnapCaps run Tuesdays and Season 1 Rewind SnapCaps run Wednesdays. Check them out and play along, if you feel so inclined.

All who wander are not Lost

So, how about that “Lost Girl” this season? I have to say, it has been a bit of a roller coast ride. Some weeks it’s just the epitome of everything I love about this show – the sexy, the action, the pathos, the sexy some more. And then some weeks it feels like wallowing knee-deep in angst. It’s like we’ve stumbled into a video for “Smells Like Succubus Spirit” or something. She is sad because Dyson left her. She is sad because Lauren left her. Emo Bo is emo, we get it. Poor Anna Silk should put in for hazard pay for all the premature wrinkles her scowling this season will surely cause.

But I think what’s irked me most is the inconsistent writing for Lauren. Now, I give the show mad respect for making her character more prominent in the second season. They obviously saw what fans responded to in the first season and responded accordingly. Still the very thing that made so many of us fall in love with Dr. Hotpants in the first place (well, besides how hot pants and other things look on her, that is) is her calm, loyal, gentle personality. One look into those big, soulful, brown eyes and we were all goners. Goners I say.

So much of that is Zoie Palmer herself, who elevated a relatively small role into total fan worship status. Yet somehow this season we’ve gotten two Laurens. The one we know and love. The calm, loyal, gentle Lauren. And the cold, insensitive, unthinking Lauren. It was the last Lauren we saw last week, when Nadia woke up and even though she told Bo she loved her and even though she told Bo she couldn’t have gotten through the past year without her and even though she and Bo had crazy hot sex, she didn’t bother to pick up the phone and say, “Hey, my girlfriend woke up!” Nope, she just walked right into Bo’s birthday party, hand-in-hand, with her coma-free girlfriend and proceeded to give Bo a steel death star as a present. Just throw it right into her heart why don’t ya, Lauren?

This inconsistency actually annoys me more than the Doccubus Interruptus Nadia’s arrival represents. Don’t get me wrong. I want Bo and Lauren to get together, end up together, spend hours upon hours on primetime television peeling tank tops off each other together. But I understand that in TV it’s not always best to get couples together right away. If I’ve learned anything from my misspent youth it is that there are always obstacles to true love that must be overcome. (Though, come on writers, we can’t get more than one good Doccubus boinking scene before you pull the rug out from under them? We’ve been so patient. We ask for so little.)

Still, I haven’t come anywhere near giving up hope. We are only half way through this second season. There’s plenty of time left for good (and hopefully sexy) things to happen. And while we’re waiting, writers, please feel free to let Bo get her sexyback on this season. Preferably with Lauren, obviously. But it’s been a bit of a dry spell for our favorite Succubus. How about you let those blue eyes blaze? And, if you need any other volunteers, trust me, I know about 10 gajillion lesbians who’d happily volunteer to die with a smile on their faces. Sucking face never looked so good.

p.s. Did I mention I’m interviewing both Zoie and Anna this week? Yeah, not a terrible week to be me.

Lost get it on

Right, so I actually had another perfectly delovely and delightful post planned for today. But you know what? It’s my birthday, so I’m going to obsess about sexy Doccubus time if I want to. And oh, how much sexy times there was to obsess about. Now, pop on over to AfterEllen a little later today and we’ll talk about the whole episode in the Lost Girl SnapCap. But right now, right now I just want to talk about the sex. I know, so shockingly out of character for me to skip right to the naughty bits.

But here is the thing about Bo and Lauren. Their sex scenes have been perfect. Too long in the coming? Yes. The slowest slow boil ever? Yes. Excruciating in their sexual tension? Yes, yes, God yes. But once they finally arrived? Perfect, just perfect. And here is why. While we’ve only had two all too brief sex scenes between our favorite bisexual succubus and her favorite human doctor, they’ve shown progress. Real, natural, organic, sexy as hell progress. Shall I dissect further? Of course I shall.

In their first love scene, it went how first times often go. It was tender, and a tad tentative. First times are exploratory missions, about finding one’s footing and making a good impression. Passion mixed with wonder. Like, whoa, is this really happening? Yes, this is really happening. Like, you know, this.

But then the second time, the second time went how second times often go. It was hot, and all hunger. Second times are singularly minded, about getting off and damning all niceties. Desire mixed with impatience. Like, why the fuck are these clothes here? Get these fucking clothes off immediately if not sooner. Like, you know, this.

But do you know what else makes Bo and Lauren’s second time so perfect? It wasn’t just the delicious, delicious tearing off of each other’s clothes to get to the juicy center. And the thing where Bo pulls Lauren back to her by her thighs. Her thighs. It was that kiss Bo gives a sleeping Lauren on the cheek. That gentle little moment tells us it’s not just sex. Not just a booty call. Not just a medicinal romp. It’s something more. Something special. Something like love. Now don’t fuck this up, Nadia. Or I swear I will have your cryogenically frozen ass turned into a popsicle.

p.s. Anyone else happily surprised by how much of a top our reserved Dr. Hotpants is? Also, how nicely her topping behavior shows off them guns? Go get ’er, cowgirl.

Making up for Lost time

On Tumblr, those delightful kids have this meme where they compare expectation to reality. Expectation is always something amazinglyawesomekickasssexy. Reality is decidedly more disappointing. And, in a way, the same meme could be applied to this season of “Lost Girl.” Expectation and reality have clashed a bit. Many fans have grumbled, myself included, about the prolonged mopey teenage pining Bo has done over the end of her relationship with Dyson. I did not tune in to see a heartsick emo succubus. I tuned in to see an amazinglyawesomekickasssexy succubus going all badass and blue-eyed on the baddies (and sometimes also the goodies). I did not tune in for Dawson’s Fae.

Some of you have worried that the lovesick, less sexy Bo is because SyFy has picked up the series for U.S. air. Producers swore at Comic-Con over the summer that SyFy hadn’t asked for any naughty scene cuts (just a few naughty word bleeps). But, indeed, it could be a case of self censoring. The show has been tamer. It could also be a function of story. A lot of her sexytimes last season were with wolfboy and now they’re no longer together. Access problems can be a real thing, people.

But I think some of the problem may also just be growing pains. The series had a considerable growth spurt between its first and second seasons, expanding from 13 episodes to 22 episodes. So perhaps that extension has slowed down the storytelling. At this point last year we would have been almost half way through the season. Now we’re barely a fourth of the way in. They’d never have been able to stretch out a breakup like this last season, that’s for sure.

Still I am keeping the faith that our expectation and reality when it comes to “Lost Girl” will meet not just in the middle, but nearer the amazinglyawesomekickasssexy side very, very soon. If the last episode and its excruciation sexual tension between Lauren and Bo are any indication, we could be in for something good. Really, really good. That boob graze is a perfect surrogate for all of our lust. We want our Doccubus and we want it now. And if we don’t get some, well, then I will be the first to call unfair Docc Block on the show and its frustrating of our fangirl fantasies.

Look, “Lost Girl,” we can be patient. But we won’t wait forever. Give us the good stuff. And by good stuff, I mean some Dr. Hotpants pants dropping. Preferably this Sunday. Preferably every Sunday.

p.s. Don’t forget to check in every Tuesday on AfterEllen for your friendly neighborhood Lost Girl SnapCaps.

My Weekend Crush

It would be easy to love Zoie Palmer just for her portrayal of the beautiful, soulful Dr. Lauren Lewis on “Lost Girl.” Those soft, searching brown eyes. The earnestness and eagerness of her human doctor indentured to a supernatural world. And, yes, the Hotpants. In a show full of strange and super-powered creatures, she is its quiet human heart. Lauren and Bo’s relationship is why I started watching “Lost Girl” and Zoie is one of the biggest reasons I fell in love with the show. She is Dr. Hotpants, how could you not? But you could always tell that under than serious demeanor something else was lurking, just dying to get out. You saw it in each deliciously sly smirk. And after last weekend’s “Lost Girl” cast appearance at Fan Expo in Canada, we all know why, too. Behind that Cheshire grin lies a total smartass.



First she delighted Team Lauren fans by saying she strategically placed herself between Anna Silk (Bo) and Kris Holden-Ried (Dyson). And then there was her dead-pan response of “Me” to the question, “What is it about Lost Girl that has this kind of universal appeal?” And when talking about how the Bo-Lauren relationship was portrayed she said it was important that “it wasn’t just, like, two chicks getting it on – which I hope you enjoy.” (See the whole panel here.) With any luck once the show premieres on Canada’s Showcase this Sunday we’ll begin to see more of that side of her in Lauren, as the producers has promised to peel back a few layers of the enigmatic Dr. Lewis this season. If we’re even luckier, the writers will make good on the promise of the “Lost Girl” season 2 promo posters that tout Lauren as “The Lover.” Oh Canada, bring on the Doccubus. Happy weekend, all.

What time is it?

My God, have I missed “Lost Girl.” In 10 days TV’s best (fine, only) story about a bisexual succubus will be back for more fae-tastic adventures. Now, I’ve talked about my not-so-secret love of this Canadian delicacy before. And I’ve waxed eloquent about what I love about its stars Anna Silk (Mary-Louise Parker doppelganger + leather) and Zoie Palmer (soulful smirk + hotpants) and the hot doccubus action. But the dirty little secret I haven’t shared is that I also enjoy that this show is quite possibly TV’s most reliable deliverer of a little thing I like to call “Boobs O’Clock.”



What, pray tell, is Boobs O’Clock? Well, you know, it’s not really something that can be explained adequately in words. Mere syllables do not do this very special time of day justice. In fact, it’s less a time and more of a state of mind – dirty mind. Please allow Bo herself to demonstrate Boobs O’Clock.

Right, so, does that clear things up? No, still confused. Right, well perhaps a little repetition will help.

Ah-ha. Now you’re grasping the concept. Grasping. Get it? Oh, never mind.

Oh, Canada. Oh, Sept. 4. It’s about that time again. Let’s do this.

Tank Top Tuesday

You know what’s nice to wear when sailing on a ship? Tank tops. You know what’s nice to see when talking about lesbian “ships?” Tank tops. Life has this beautiful symmetry to it sometimes. Today, in honor of some of our favorite gay lady relationships on TV (maintext, subtext & just the voices in our head varieties), how about a little friendly couple competition? Which pair wears it best? And, to get even more cutthroat, which partner in each pairing wears it best? Total lezzer tank top supremacy awaits, ladies. Choose wisely.

Naya RiveraStill No. 1 in our hearts, minds and pants.

Heather MorrisStill No. 1 in Santana’s heart, mind and pants.

Anna SilkIf you haven’t watched “Lost Girl,” I actually pity you.

Zoie PalmerDr. Hot Pants should always pair them with a tightly fitted tank. Always.

Sara RamirezTank scrubs, think about it Seattle Grace.

Jessica CapshawReally, really think about it Seattle Grace.

Lily LovelessLily, a pint and that smirk – it’s all a growing girl needs to survive.

Kat PrescottThough, of course, a daily supplement of Kat couldn’t hurt either.

Lea MicheleNow this is entirely different kind of “bait girl” look. I approve.

Dianna AgronWearing a tank top is basically the same thing as wearing a “Likes Girls” T-shirt, no?

Angie HarmonThis season on “Rizzoli & Isles,” in addition to wanting more eye sex we should all demand more tank tops.

Sasha AlexanderIsles being a Rizzoli is both confusing and hot. So. Fucking. Hot.

Man, life is just one tough decision after another.