I believe that children are our future, mostly because Whitney Houston sang it in her pre-Bobby Brown days when you could still trust her. But, seriously, it’s the youth who shall inherit the earth and they might as well wear a tank top because they're inheriting a seriously warming planet. What? I’m just trying to think positive. While some of these ladies are on the outer edge of age-appropriateness for me, I’d hate to be accused of ageism. When it comes to women in tank tops, I am a strict equal opportunity luster. In fact, Special Agent Sarah Walker, err, Yvonne Strahovski above is our oldest tank topper at 26. But don’t worry, Chris Hansen, I checked all their IDs. Everybody’s legal, nobody’s going to jail. Put away the cuffs…or maybe not. Ahem. And with that, I give you Tank Top Tuesday: The Next Generation.
Lindsay Lohan, 22Is it just me, or has she gotten hotter as she has gotten gayer?
Freida Pinto, 24“Slumdog Millionaire” made me a believer. This tank top made me a worshipper.
Jessica Stroup, 22Tank Top + Fire + Kissing Heather Graham = Almost enough to make me watch “90210”… almost, but still no.
Rihanna, 20Standing under Rihanna’s umbrella is optional. Staring at her tank vest is mandatory.
Hayden Panettiere, 19What kind of space-age polymer does your tank top need to be made out of if you’re indestructible? These are the questions that keep me up at night.
Kristen Stewart, 18Why do vampires love tank tops? Two words: easy access.
Mandy Musgrave, 22, and Gabrielle Christian, 24Oh, Spashley. If only your storyline lived up to your tank tops.
Blake Lively, 21
It’s official. I’ve made a tragic error in not watching “Gossip Girl.”
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