SGALGG: The Call in Gay Edition

Cough, sniffle, queer. Oh, I'm sorry. Don't mind me. I'm feeling a little, um, gay today. In fact, I'm feeling so terribly gay, I might have to call in gay tomorrow. You know, just in case this whole gay thing doesn't clear up in time. Tomorrow, Dec. 10, has been deemed the Day Without A Gay. Besides rhyming, the movement is another protest of Proposition 8 and all its ilk. But this time instead of marching down the middle of the street with fantastic signs and booming chants, we are all encouraged to call in sick to work and donate our time to a worthy cause Wednesday. [Hat tip, Meenoo and Lopey!]

I can see this conversation with bosses around the country already: “Hello, look, I'm sorry I've got to call in gay today...Yeah, I'm running a high gayver so I'm definitely too gay to work right now...Oh, don't worry. Gay is not contagious ...OK, sometimes Jennifer Beals has been known to cause mass outbreaks of the gay, but otherwise, it's completely nontransferable. I promise...Fine, Tina Fey can make you a little gay, too...And Rachel Maddow...And...fine, so it's a little contagious. See, this is why I need to stay home. I'm totally gay. Later!”

Even if you can't take the day off work, you can still be a part of the nation boycott by not buying anything, spending money or supporting the economy in any way. And Henry Paulson thought he had problems before. As we learned last week, every time a gay finds love at the parade there's money to be made. In essence, we're telling the country that if they like that gay dollar, they'd better – in the immortal words of Beyonce – put a ring on it.

And, of course, you don't have to be GLBT to participate. You can keep your straight dollar in your pocket, too. In fact, from the looks of things everyone wants to get in on this calling in gay business. I mean, look at all the Straight Gals Acting Like Gay Gals just so they, too, can call in gay. Heck, we've even got Gay Gals Acting Like Gay Gals With Straight Gals, or GGALGGWSG for slightly shorter (I love acronyms that sound like gargling rocks). And with that, please enjoy SGALGG: The Call In Gay Edition.

Felicity Huffman & Marcia CrossCalling in gay takes practice, lots and lots of practice.

Emily Deschanel & Rose McGowanThe classic “Oh, honey, I left a little lipstick on you” move.

Tilda Swinton & Kate Del Castillo The look that results afterward in the classic “Oh honey, I left a little lipstick on you” move.

Iman & Nicole KidmanI can't tell if Iman wants to kiss Nicole or lick her forehead to make sure it's not made of plastic.

Kate Bosworth & Helena ChristensenI has a snuggle bunny.

Angelina Jolie & Jacqueline BissettI'd forget about Brad in a hurry, too, if I saw Jacqueline.

Lily Tomlin & Meryl StreepLily graciously helps Meryl with her gay method acting.

Cate Blanchett & Juliette LewisWell, I hope that Juliette at least asked first.