[Click to embiggen the skinnyjeanapolooza.]
So yesterday the paparazzi found Ellen Page and Clea DuVall walking together in Old Montreal. This isn’t an enormous deal. People walk together all the time. I walked in to work yesterday with a co-worker whose name I can’t remember even though we’ve worked together for years. It doesn’t have to mean anything. Except, of course, we to think it does. Are they friends? Are they friends who wear the exact same black high-top Chucks and skinny charcoal jeans? Are they “friends.” It’s so fun to speculate . I do it. All the time. Constantly. I wallow in it sometimes. It’s silly, really. But it’s also telling.
When a celebrity we perceive as gay is spotted with another celebrity we hope is gay, woo doggie, do we project. It’s the whole Gay by Association theory. If Star A is gay and Star B knows Star A, Star B must also be gay. Dude, if only it was that easy. Don’t you think I would have made the cute barista with the cool (and might I add complimentary) spoon thumb ring gay if we had that kind of power? If merely walking down the street, going to dinner, being seen in the presence of one of us could make a person queer, honey, every day would be a gay pride parade.
I guess what this all boils down to is human nature. We’re curious creatures, that’s for sure. Sometimes I think besides opposable thumbs, the ability to gossip is what really sets humankind apart from the rest of Earth’s animals. But we also have a desperate desire to feel a little less alone on this big ball of rock going around the sun. And so if seeing someone who hope might be like us give us even the tiniest hint that she might, in fact, really be like us – well we’ll take that tiny crumb and run with it. Sometimes it’s just a crumb, sometimes it’ll lead you to the whole cake. In this case, I don’t honestly know. I have no grand thesis here. But I am glad Ellen and Clea are friends. Because in my head, Graham from “But I’m a Cheerleader” and Juno from, well – you know, “Juno,” were already BFFs. Isn’t it great when reality finally catches up to the voices in your head.
So this Saturday night I shot pool, went bowling and played a round of mini-golf. It was a real hat trick of lesbian recreational activities. I feel like if I also played softball, field hockey and perhaps basketball (or tennis, depending on your inclination) that same night, I might have set some sort of homosexual sporting record. So with that in mind, I thought I’d get this week started by celebrating in our shared lesbian tendencies. And what better way to do that than to make a call to the Lez Chat line? I have no idea how this little gem slipped my attention last summer (actually, I do – that’s when I was on vacation in Europe), but I’m very happy to be able to bring it to you now. This little clip also makes for an excellent game of Spot the Lesbian Icon.
