Showing posts with label Movie Madness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Movie Madness. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Season of Charlize

I find Charlize Theron really interesting. In part, because she’s just straight-up gorgeous and I almost never tire of looking at a pretty face. But an even larger part is because she’s not just a pretty face. And a pretty face with something more behind it, now that I really never tire of looking at. But what I find most interesting is that instead of making a career of being straight-up gorgeous, she has chosen to do more. And, no, I’m not just talking her “uglying up” for “Monster.” Last year she was in “Young Adult,” where she played unlikeable to a dangerously convincing degree. And next up are two films coming this June that again take her outside the stereotypical gorgeous blonde box.

The first is “Snow White and the Huntsman,” where she steps up unlikeable and takes it all the way to evil as the Evil Queen. And then it’s in action hero mode in the “Alien” prequel “Prometheus.” Man, do both these movies look good. Like, let’s do this, buy the jumbo tub of popcorn, my body is ready good. And in part that’s because, well, they just look cool. But also because they are both films with strong female leads and impressive casts. “Snow White” also stars Kristen Stewart, Chris Hemsworth and some spiffy looking special effects. And “Prometheus” includes spiffy looking cast Noomi Rapace, Michael Fassbender, Guy Pearce and Idris Elba – plus some spiffy special effects. All in all, I’m ready for the Season of Charlize in the cinema. Bring it, blondie.

Snow White and the Huntsman


Prometheus


So, which movie are you most excited for? Me, I’m going double feature.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

This kiss

Hey, it’s March. And, now that I lost that hour of sleep, also officially spring. Well, spring in my book at least. All you sticklers for “calendars” and “equinoxes” and “facts” will tell me spring isn’t for a week still. But, you know, close enough. And in spring, a young gay lady’s fancy turns to love. And you can’t have love without kissing. And this leads me to the AfterEllen Mach Madness: Ultimate Lesbian Kissing Championships. We’re already in Round 2, and already there have been some bracket busters in my book. Now, I’m not advocating for any kiss over another. Sweet lesbian baby Jesus, do I not want to start a shipping war. I just want to celebrate kissing, period. Because kissing is, well, awesome. And lesbian kissing is the awesomest. So here are a few of my very favorite pop culture lesbian kisses. Some are still in the championships, others not. But what I want to rejoice in instead is just the joy of kissing. So pucker up. Let’s kiss.

Idgie & Ruth, “Fried Green Tomatoes”

Sure, it’s just a chaste little peck on the cheek. But that split second is the beginning. From that moment on, Idgie would do anything to see Ruth’s smile. And we know it, too. And it’s glorious.

Willow & Tara, “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” (Entropy, S6E18)

[Starts at 13:28]
This wasn’t Willow and Tara’s first kiss. This wasn’t Willow & Tara’s last kiss. But it was the kiss that showed more than just the love between these two women, which we always knew was there, but the passion. This was that moment that nothing else mattered, and they just had to be kissing each other. Right now.

Alice & Dana, “The L Word” (Limb from Limb, S1E13)

Of course Dana can’t marry Tonya. Of course. Because of Alice. That’s why.

Bette & Tina, “The L Word” (Let’s Get This Party Started, S5E4)

Three words: Hunger. Anguish. Love.

Naomi & Emily, “Skins” (Katie & Emily, S3E9)

Three more words: Hot. Hot. Hot.

Camille & Petra, “When Night is Falling”

When trepidation mixes with wonder, when desire overtakes fear, you have a kiss that speaks volumes while saying absolutely nothing at all.

So, kittens, now it’s your turn. Show me your smooches.

Friday, March 9, 2012

My Weekend Crush

I watch a lot of TV these days. A lot a lot. But I’ll freely admit that movies are my first love. Something about sitting in the dark with strangers makes for a singular experience that can never be replicated on the comfort of your couch. But the other thing I’ll freely admit is I’ve seen a lot better TV lately than I have movies. Last year in particular was a bit of a movie bust for me. I saw a handful I liked and everything else – meh.

Then, finally, I saw one that made me say wow. Granted, I saw it this year. But it came out last year. And I’ve wanted to see it for what seems like forever. And that movie is “Pariah.” You’ve probably heard about it too, and if you’re lucky you’ve had a chance to see it for yourself. It’s a lovely slice of filmmaking – really everything you want from a movie. Insightful. Emotional. Beautiful. Truthful.

This striking first feature from writer-director Dee Rees takes a small story and makes it universally felt. Because we have all felt like Alike. We have all felt like an outsider. We have all felt like a stranger in our own skin. We have all felt like we could not be our true selves – if only for a moment. But for Alike, played by the wonderfully expressive Adepero Oduye, that feeling is more than a moment. It is her home. And in her portrayal we can see, through unblinking eyes, how hard it can be to bit is to be rejected for just being who you are. Yet also the courage it takes to choose your own happiness.

We may not all come from the same background as Alike. We may all have different paths through life. But we all want to be ourselves, whatever that may be. And we hope that the wider world will not only allow it, but embrace who we are. We want to say yes our truth, because our truth is all we are. We are not broken, we are free. Happy weekend, all.

Friday, February 24, 2012

My Weekend Crush

You guys! You guys, you guys, you guys. Wait. Stop. Make that, you gals! You gals, you gals, you gals! You know what’s making me super excited about this movie year? A shock of cascading red hair, a sure-tipped arrow and a badass display of self-bodice ripping. Yeah, I’m talking about the two minute and 30 second clip from “Brave” released this week. Pixar’s first film to feature a female lead isn’t in theaters until June 22. That’s four months away. But already the film looks to like it will add a rich, spunky, capable heroine to the cinematic pantheon. Also, who doesn’t love a good mooning gag? Now I love me some Pixar and, of course, I love the ladies, so this movie is aimed right at my bullseye, so to speak. Oh, and Scottish accents, I kind of can’t resist a Scottish accent. Happy weekend, all.

Friday, January 20, 2012

My Weekend Crush


I love “Finding Nemo.” I loved it from the first moment I saw it at a dollar theater after it had long ended its regular run because I was too cool to go see an animated movie no matter how much everyone raved about it. Now, I own the DVD. I downloaded it to my phone. I may even have cuddly stuffed Dory. That last one was a gift, I swear. What I love most about it, besides being smart and funny and as adorable as can be, is that it makes me feel better each time I watch it. We all have that movie, the one we put on as a guaranteed mood lifter. Sure, there’s the Bambi-esque opening with its bad things that happen to good fish eggs. But then there is everything else. And everything else makes me just plum happy. In fact, it’s kind of my happy place. And, in January, I’m always looking for things to make me happy – this January is no different. So after a long, tiring, stressful week, I plan to put on a little “Find Nemo” and talk whale with Dory. And then, then I should be ready to just keep swimming through the rest of the year. Happy weekend, all.

Thursday, November 24, 2011

She's trying to teach me how to cook

I am not a good chef. I’m just not. I enjoy food, a lot. But my culinary expertise pretty much stops at “How do you like your eggs?” (Though, I am good at eggs. So, you know, feel free to stay for breakfast.) Still I do love watching other people cook, especially if those other people are hot ladies. So on this day of feasting in the United States, here is one of my favorite cooking scene pretty much ever. If learning to cook was always like this, I’d be well on my way to being a master chef. Happy Thanksgiving, all.


p.s. The only way that scene could have been better is if they kissed at the end, like they clearly wanted to. Idgie and Ruth, my first OTP.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Dinner and a movie

As soon as that crisp comes into the air, I think of two things. One, how much of a pain in the ass it will be to have to travel during the holidays. I mean, really, airports at Christmas are the least merry places on Earth. And then the second, is what movies are going to make me run out to a theater near me soon. All the trailers for the big Serious Oscar Contenders start to roll out. And then the super advance trailers for next summer’s blockbusters muscle in as well. It hasn’t been a great movie year for me so far. I mean, I’ve seen some I liked (Harry Potter, I really liked Harry Potter – along with the rest of the planet), but not really that many. A few trailers for upcoming films have already caught my eye, like “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” and “Albert Nobbs.” So now it’s time to look at some more films coming up soon (or soon-ish) with great female leads that look worthy a $23 tub of popcorn.

Pariah (December 2011, limited)

God, I hope this movie gets a wider release. I really, really do.

The Iron Lady (December 2011)

Not because of Thatcher, all because of Streep. Also Giles (I see you, Anthony Stewart Head, I see you.)

Haywire (January 2012)

To die between mixed martial arts fighter Gina Carano’s thighs? Um, I can think of worse ways to go.

The Hunger Games (March 2012)

OK, OK. I’m convinced. Bring on the dystopia and bows and arrows.

Snow White and the Huntsman (June 2012)

Yes, K-Stew in shining armor is nice. But make no mistake, I am seeing this movie for Charlize. Evil, succubusy, gorgeous Charlize.

Brave (June 2012)

Is it possible to be envious of an animated character’s hair? Because, I am. Also, her feisty attitude ain’t bad either.

Right. So, now the only question is do you want extra butter on your popcorn or not?

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Hello, Mr. Nobbs

Glenn Close, handsome woman and, interesting, also a pretty handsome man. The trailer for the new film “Albert Nobbs” has me all kind of excited. Not just because Glenn is passing as a man to work in Victorian England. Not just because it looks like a cross between “Upstairs Downstairs” and “Tipping the Velvet.” Not just because Glenn romances Mia Wasikowska (actually, that weirds me out just a little – hello, 42-year age difference).

But because, well, it looks good. And Glenn looks terrific. And the whole thing could just be really, really interesting. Heck, I was excited when I first heard about the film, period. But now that there’s a trailer, well, sign me up for some complicated Victorian-era gender politics with a love triangle to boot.


Right? I just hope poor Albert doesn’t get his (her?) heart broken. I already have a soft spot for that strange, kind little man. Though if Mia won’t have him, something tells me Albert just might have a date in the future with another funny little man, a man named Oscar.

Monday, September 26, 2011

Dragon lady


OK, I’m in. Sure, I have my reservations. Sure, I loved the original. Sure, I really, really loved Noomi Rapace. But I am in for the new American remake. Is it necessary? Probably not. Reading subtitled is not that hard. Still the new trailer has made me hopeful. This thing could be good. This thing could be quite good. But, you know, don’t take my word for it. Judge for yourself.

So first things first, Rooney Mara is no Noomi Rapace. Clearly. But, Rooney could still be a fairly kick-ass Lisbeth Salander. Different, yes. But perhaps somewhat more like what author Stieg Larsson envisioned in his original description of her as a grown-up Pippi Longstocking who is “a pale, anorexic young woman who had hair as short as a fuse, and a pierced nose and eyebrows…On those occasions when she had been wearing a tank top, a dragon tattoo can be seen on her left shoulder blade.”

Also David Fincher is undeniably a talented director and his taut, stylish camera work is already evident in the trailer. I mean, if he can make a bunch of nerds staring at computer screens seem suspenseful then think what he can do with a genuinely suspenseful story like this. It’s almost…frightening.

Though one of my continued concerns is that this movie looks a little like the Mikael Blomkvist story instead of the Lisbeth Salander show. Some of this is due to the casting. Daniel Craig is James Bond, and Rooney Mara is that girl who dumped the guy who invented Facebook. So while Craig is the marquee name, hopefully Rooney will still be the main attraction when all things are said and done.

Though one of the things I’m obviously happy to see is that Lisbeth’s bisexuality is still intact. Though, there was never much doubt that would make it into the new film. (SPOILER ALERT: Skip the rest of this paragraph if you haven’t read the book or seen the film.) What I like about the trailer is that while Lisbeth’s relationship with Miriam is revealed, her relationship with Blomkvist is barely hinted at. Part of that is probably because it’s the natural progression with the story and a pretty big thing to give away in a preview. But it’s also somewhat encouraging because the easiest thing marketers can do to make a female character who has an eye for the ladies more appealing to male viewers is to show she also has an eye for the fellas.

Though, the poster more than makes up for the trailer’s restraint. And it also points to more of my Blomkvist Show v. Salander Show worries. She is naked, he is clothed. She looks small, he looks imposing. Even the way he is holding her is equal parts dominating and protective. Lisbeth Salander doesn’t need a protector – even if he is 007.

But the poster is the poster, the film is the film. And I think for all my love of the original, I’m still going to give this American version a chance. And if it also turns out to be good, well then there will be two movies about a fierce, ferociously independent heroine that are worth watching. And that’s not a bad thing, not a bad thing at all.

Monday, September 19, 2011

Muppet Monday

Why are there so many songs about rainbows? Because rainbows are fucking awesome, that’s why. Now, when I first heard they were making a new Muppet movie, I was skeptical. Messing with beloved childhood memories is always a tricky proposition. But then I heard that Jason Segel was behind the project and I was really, really skeptical. Keep in mind, this news came out the same year as “Saving Forgetting Sarah Marshall.” So pretty much I knew him as that guy whose junk I saw way too much of. But, mostly, it was the beloved childhood memory thing. I cried the day Jim Henson died, I really did.

So then, as the movie developed, I was anxious to see what direction they’d go. The first trailer was perfectly charming. And now, well, their new parody trailer “The Pig with the Froggy Tattoo” has totally won me over. You had me at “Wocka. Wocka,” new Muppet movie.


The new Muppet movie also comes with a brand new Muppet album, which makes sense because music was such a big part of the original movies and show. NPR streamed the whole album last month. (Sadly, the stream is now over.) But, you can hear the very new, very different Muppet theme song by OK GO. When I first heard it, I hated it. Then it grew on me and I kind of dug it. Then I watched the video and I was a little “Nope, hipster nonsense.”

So, judge for yourself. I actually don’t mind the crunky synth wheeze of the new song. But for some reason when paired with the video it’s just not working for me anymore. I think it’s because the dude with the cap and beard looks more Muppety than the actual Muppets.


And, well, it is hard to improve upon something as flat-out sensational, inspirational, celebrational, Muppetationalas this.


OK, new Muppet movie. I’m going to give you a try. Just don’t go breaking my heart. I already have “The Rainbow Connection” to do that. Talk amongst yourselves, kittens. I’ll just be sitting on this log, reliving my childhood until the new movie comes out.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Over the girl

Last week we spoke about that elusive good lesbian movie, so this week I thought we’d take a trip back in the way-back machine to a little year I like to call 1997. Bill Clinton was still in office. No one had ever heard of Monica Lewinsky. No one outside of Texas had heard of George W. Bush. The war in Iraq was a distant memory. This whole internet thing was just starting to seem awesome. And a little movie called “All Over Me” was released.



There is nothing really flashy about “All Over Me,” and that’s a good thing. It’s just the story of a teenage girl, Claude (Alison Folland), growing up in New York’s Hell’s Kitchen and trying to navigate the big city and her bigger emotions for her best friend, Ellen (Tara Subkoff). I haven’t seen it in years (note to self: order the DVD immediately), but I can still remember how real it felt the first time I watched it. Everything about it – the grit, the hunger, the devotion, the confusion – it was all so honest. And so raw. Most movies about teenagers today delight in making them precocious one-liner machines. They’re too cool for whatever school they’re stuck in, and we know it. But “All Over Me” wasn’t interested in the normal trappings of Hollywood a coming-of-age stories, or being cool. It was just interested in being real.



One scene in particular sticks with me, all these years later. When Claude is helping Ellen in the restaurant bathroom and she says to her, “Everyone knows I’m your dog.” My God, haven’t we all been there. For young women, gay and straight, the female friendships we have as teenagers are some of the most intense and most complicated of our lives. It’s a fascinating dynamic that rarely gets touched on in most movies beyond the sassy best friend character. But what fertile cinematic ground awaits for those who dig a little deeper.



I’d always hoped for more great things from the filmmakers, sisters Alex and Sylvia Sichel, would go on to do many more great things. The last major credit for them on IMDB is the Chloe Sevigny and Michelle Williams “1972” segment in “If These Walls Could Talk 2.” That, by the way, was my favorite segment from that film, one that again showcased the sisters skill at subtle, yet powerful realism. Also, damn, it was hot.



And so were scenes in “All Over Me.” Why hello, adorable young, pink-haired Leisha Hailey. Hello very much.

All that and it also stars Rickie Vasquez Wilson Cruz. Yep, definitely buying this DVD. Definitely.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

It's a small world after all

So over the weekend I tried to watch “Room in Rome,” emphasis on tried. Man, that movie was a hot mess, emphasis on mess. And then I also watched “Bloomington,” which in true lesbian fashion I am still processing my feelings about. But what both movies reminded me is of the audacity of hope we have each time we watch a new lesbian movie. Maybe, just maybe, this will be The One. The good lesbian movie, at long last. We have so precious few. So I’m pleased to say there are a few lesbian films (or at the very least lesbianish ones) coming out soon that make me again hope against hope. Interestingly, they’re all foreign films. (Come on America, what happened to “We’re No. 1!”?) But who cares about borders, I’ll watch any lesbian movie from anywhere as long as it isn’t “Bar Girls.” No, seriously, never make me watch “Bar Girls” again. Let one, or with any luck all, of these movies be the bad lesbian movie antidote.



Circumstance

Wow, this movie looks beautiful. And not only beautiful, but importance as it shines a needed light of the plight of lesbians in Middle Eastern countries, in this case Iran. Also, wow, this movie looks beautiful.

Love Crime

So this isn’t so much straight-up lesbian as it is straight-up mind fuck. But there are definite lesbian undertones. Also Kristin Scott Thomas speaks French. So, you know, sold.

Kyss Mig (Kiss Me)

I’ve raved about how good this film looks before. And I’ll rave about how good it looks again. Also, have I mentioned one of my raves made the film’s official movie poster? Does this mean my ticket is free when it finally opens here?

So there you have it. A world of lesbian cinema awaits. Fingers crossed, ladies, fingers crossed.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Hungry eyes

Lesbians have a love/hate relationship with lesbian movies. We love to watch them, but we hate how bad they often are. As any nascent lesbian going through her I-must-consume-every-lesbian-movie-ever-made phase can tell you, not all lesbian movies are created equal. In fact, don’t tell the religious right this, but instead of using their so-called “ex-gay” therapies, they’d have much better results by forcing us to watch “Bar Girls” and “Claire of the Moon” on a continuous loop. They’re almost bad enough to turn even the gayest gal straight. Almost.

So this weekend, I thought I’d have a lezzer movie binge and watch one I’d never seen before. Somehow, despite my best intentions, I’d never had a chance to catch “Nina’s Heavenly Delights.” This is kind of crazy considering 1) the cast is crazy gorgeous and 2) it’s about food. Hello, gorgeous people and food consumer a good 85 percent of my waking thoughts. And it was also nice to see Shelley Conn and Laura Fraser in earlier roles, since I’ve seen both subsequently in other projects (“Mistresses” and “Lip Service,” most recently).

Was it a great film? No. Choppy plotting, uneven characterizations, contrived situations. Also, I could have done without ghost dad. I felt at any minute Whoopi Goldberg might show up and say, “Nina, you in danger, girl.” But it was cute in its own way and had so much pretty to look at in the form of Shelley and Laura that I can forgive it some of its sins. But, yeah, it’s not going on my iPhone next to “Imagine Me and You,” or anything.

What it did give us was one truly sexy moment between Shelley’s Nina and Laura’s Lisa. And I’m not talking about any of the kisses, though they were nice. They really were. But, what I thought worked best in the film was its hunger. And not just for chicken xacuti. I mean the other kind of hunger. Laura in particular does a lovely job of conveying her hunger, with her big eyes and eager face. It’s also a testament to her acting abilities that I find her entirely winsome in this film whereas I find Cat on “Lip Service” a tad irritating. But right, back to the scene.

Right, now if the whole movie had been like those 19 seconds, well, that would have been truly heavenly.

Monday, July 4, 2011

Independence Day

I can’t think of a better way to honor Independence Day than with a little Ani DiFranco and girls kissing. In fact, I feel like it’s our constitutional duty to celebrate the Fourth of July in this fashion. What did our Founding Fathers fight for anyway if not right for us to have a three-day weekend and use those three days to make videos of hot women kissing. At least, I think that’s what I remember learning in my high school history class. Maybe my textbook was different from yours. Anyway, I clearly used my time wisely this weekend and spent it making this. Please be gentle, it is my first (and possibly last) music video compilation. (Also watch it in HD, it’s prettier that way.) No one else had Ani’s “Independence Day” set to anything. So, you know, I kind of had to. Happy birthday, America. And, you know, happy Monday everyone else.

Friday, May 20, 2011

My Weekend Crush

Before “Bridesmaids” opened to stellar box office last weekend, the prevailing critical buzz was a plaintive plea for men to see this movie despite the fact that it starred a bunch of women. It’s not a chick flick! Funny for everyone! Guys will love this! And while those things are all very, very true, it also irks me a little. Because there’s also nothing wrong with saying this either: Ladies, you will love this movie. No, really, you will love this movie. Laugh until the verge of bladder control issues. Bury your head in your friend’s shoulder from disbelief. Even, yes, maybe mist up a little. This movie is what women have been waiting for from comedies. It is the opposite of everything we hate about the movies we’re supposed to like. In place of treacle and triteness, it gives us hilarity and heart.

The industry always frets that “women’s films” don’t make money. But the truth of the matter is bad women’s films don’t make money. And, let’s be perfectly honest, most chick flicks suck. But when instead you give us quality, fleshed-out characters and whip-smart writing, and we will come to the tune of a $26 million opening weekend. And, heavens, I haven’t even started on the performances. Perfect cast is perfect. Kristen Wiig, Maya Rudolph, Rose Byrne, Wendi McLendon-Covey, Ellie Kemper, Melissa McCarthy. Good God, Melissa McCarthy. You all know I love Kristen to bits and pieces already, but Melissa nearly stole the show from some of the best show stealers in the business. If this cast doesn’t finally and forever put to rest the idiotic “women aren’t funny” bullshit, then nothing ever will.

I think one of the best things about this film, other than the free ab workout from the ugly snort laughing, was leaving the theater made me feel good about being a woman. Too many films make us feel bad about our womanhood. They say only the happily ever after will make us truly happy. But “Bridesmaids” reached for a different kind of aspiration, the sort that says it’s OK to let your freak flag fly. We’re too complex for the stereotypes, too interesting for the Hollywood ending. We women are weird and wonderful creatures, and it’s nice to have a film that celebrates that for a change. Boys, you are more than welcome to come along for the ride. But this movie, this movie is all ours, baby. Happy weekend, all.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Sucker Princess

Oh, “Sucker Punch.” How you’re still disappointing me days later. It wasn’t just that it was bad, which it was. It’s that it had so much potential to be awesome, which it wasn’t. Girl power isn’t just a girl with a gun. Girl power is giving women the power to control their own destinies, to decide their own fates, to carve out their own places in the world. All that lovely talent and whiz-bang CGI wizardry and what you’re left with is an ugly mess that manages to be as unsexy as it is unfun. How do you make two hours of hot girls in tiny skirts kicking ass boring? Like I said, disappointing.

But you know what’s not disappointing? “Sucker Punch” and Disney Princess mash-ups. Certainly the Disney damsels too often represent their own set of gender stereotypes and problematic perpetuations. But they never wallowed as much in their unapologetic misogyny as Zack Snyder’s little porn fetish rape fantasy. Plus, their villains were way, way better. Steampunk zombies have nothing on Ursula the Sea Witch.


You don’t know how much I wish I had seen this movie instead.

Monday, March 28, 2011

SGALGG: Sucker Punch Edition

As counterintuitive as this may sound, there are considerably better ways to spend a Saturday night than with five hot girls in tiny shirts kicking ass. So, yeah, “Sucker Punch” is not a good movie. It’s a bad movie. And not good bad, but bad bad. It’s like they gave a 14-year-old videogame addict $82 million dollars and told him to go make the movie of his dreams. Except they told him he wasn’t allowed to show nudity or sex. So he made up for it with more samurais and more robots and more dragons and more zombie German soldiers. Oh, and a lot of threats of rape. Sigh. Also thanks to all the slo-mo CGI green screenery, I never noticed how short Emily is. She’s a good head shorter than all her co-stars. She’s practically elfin. Has anyone checked her ears?

Of course, none of this complaining about the film is meant in any way to disparage the movie’s lovely leading ladies. Emily Browning, Abbie Cornish, Jena Malone, Vanessa Hudgens, Jamie Chung and Carla Gugino are very lovely. In fact, I think I might have enjoyed the film more on mute, just to gaze at their loveliness and forget the huge fucking mess around them. Still, I am grateful to the movie for bringing these delightful women together, and giving them the opportunity to do their best Straight Gals Acting Like Gay Gals renditions at the film’s premiere last week. In short, save the 10 bucks and just enjoy the eye candy here. You can always make your own popcorn at home.

Carla & EmilySqueeze a little tighter, darling. It’s working.

Emily & VanessaSo that’s why she broke up with Zac.

Abbie & EmilySignature short-girl second base move. Trust me, I’m short.

Emma Roberts, Emily & some girl who went for itHey, you’ve got to take your shots when you see them.

Vanessa & JenaNo, wait, clearly this is why she broke up with Zac.

Jamie & AbbieWhatever Abbie is doing, Jamie likes it.

Abbie & CarlaSomewhere Ryan Phillippe is seething.

Malin Akerman & CarlaHer ex-costars keep coming back for more snuggle time.

CarlaAnd now we know why.

Read my full “Sucker Punch” review on AfterEllen.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Punch drunk

You guys, I’m kind of ridiculously excited about “Sucker Punch.” It’s three weeks and a day away now and I’m practically hopping around the room in anticipation. Do I think this will be a “Citizen Kane*”-esque work of cinema to be discussed in film theory classes for generations to come? Well, no. Do I think it’s going to be a ridiculous amount of fun watching five girls flip around in tiny skirts while kicking major ass? Hell yeah. And, yes, we could get into a long conversation about why girl heroes need to be in body suits, short skirts and bitty bikinis to get seen while male heroes need only to show up in a tuxedo, T-shirt or occasionally Batsuit. But, let’s face it, that’s the world. It sucks and it’s tiring and it’s everywhere. And while I will happily rage against it any other day, today I’m going to celebrate the fact that five female leads – regardless of what they are or aren’t wearing –get to headline a big-budget action spectacular. Women just don’t get to do that all that often and definitely not in such large numbers. So, I’m taking it, tiny skirts and all. And, truth be told, I’m not entirely against tiny skirts as a concept. Ahem.


p.s. I’m also pretty damn excited about “Hanna.” And Saoirse Ronan doesn’t even have to wear a tiny skirt.


Bring it, ladies. Bring it.

*Damn, I got too carried away with the alliteration. Or was thinking of that other, less Oscar-worthy “Citizen Cane” which can be found in the backrooms of seedy video stores across the country.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Our stories, Ourselves


I try to write about women’s issues a lot on this blog – not just because I’m a woman, but because it matters how 51 percent of the population is treated in this world. I would hope that even if I wasn’t a woman I’d still care a lot about women’s issues. Women’s rights, women’s representation, women’s equality – they aren’t just about how women are treated, but what we value as a society. Even though this is mostly just a silly site that merrily muses about effervescent pop culture and pretty, pretty ladies, I try to do my small part to advocate for more, better and total inclusion of women in all forms of entertainment. This year I made an informal resolution to myself to stop watching TV shows that don’t pass the Bechdel Rule. So that killed “Hawaii Five-O” (Grace Park in a bikini is great, but it’d be even greater if she had another regular female castmate to talk with each week.) In TV – where we follow characters for years, not just 90 minutes – it’s even less excusable to not pass the simple test of having two female characters who talk to each other about something other than a man.

But what we see on screen is one thing, what happens behind the screen is another. The simple fact, the undeniable truth is that we women simply are not in command of our own stories. You see, who tells a story matters. Yet according to a new study by the Women’s Media Center, only 8 percent of all film writers are women. That means 92 percent are men, telling all of the stories we see on the screen. In 2009, women directed 7 percent of the top films that year. That’s the same percentage as in 1987, more than two decades ago. Last year, everyone crowed about the great stride for womankind with Kathryn Bigelow’s win as the first woman in 82 years to win an Academy Award for directing. She was only the fourth woman ever to receive the nomination. This year no women were nominated, despite two female-directed films landing best pictures nods. One step forward, yet we’re still looking up from the bottom rung.

These kinds of stark imbalances are sadly not sequestered to the world of entertainment. Women represent less than 25 percent of all op-ed pieces written, 13 percent of Sunday morning news show guests and 3 percent of the decision makers in the media. And we haven’t even reached the halls of real power. Out of 435 members of the House of Representatives, only 79 are women. Out of 100 senators, only 17 are women. We’ve only ever had one female Speaker of the House, who has now been relegated to minority leader. We are still waiting for our first-ever female vice president or president. Waiting, waiting, waiting.

Just yesterday it was revealed in The New York Times that just 13 percent of Wikipedia contributors are women. And Wikipedia is a self-selecting group that can create, edit, contribute at will. So we’re self-selecting ourselves out of 87 percent of the information shared on one of the world’s largest information databases. Fantastic.

These numbers should make us furious. We should be livid. We should demand and accept nothing less than an equal place at the tables of power. Yet, here we are, chugging along. We coexist calmly in the face of inherent inequality. And, sure we frequently bemoan our fate and raise a righteous fuss, but otherwise we kind of just accept it. Maybe it’s that we've been conditioned to pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. So we’ve been fooled into not caring. But it matters who tells our stories, who makes our news, who controls our power.

I guess this is my long and rambling way of saying, I’m mad. I think we all should be mad. That informal Bechdel resolution is now a permanent one. Same goes for movies. Same goes for whatever I put out there every day in my small of slices of that media pie. I’m going to try harder, be madder, get louder. Our stories deserve to be told, and we deserve to tell them.

Monday, January 31, 2011

To infinity, and beyond


What is it about our childhoods? The holding on, the reaching back. I guess it’s because things were simpler, we were simpler. Nostalgia, on its own, is a powerful thing. But when coupled with other emotions – love, loss, regret, hope – it can comfort us better than any blanket. Over the weekend my mother’s best friend, a woman I’ve known since the fourth grade, died suddenly. Wife, mother, grandmother, friend. She was one of the most gracious, hard-working and thoughtful persons I’ve ever known. Our families were close. We spent almost every Christmas Eve together – including this past year – for decades. Yet there, on the other end of that phone call, I wished I was closer. But the 2,000 miles between us meant I could only offer condolences and platitudes. Once the call was over, I was left alone with just thoughts of her family and my mother and all those shared holidays and meals and laughs. So I sought out my own comforting nostalgia. And what I turned to for a surrogate hug was Pixar. It may seem silly to find solace in movies. But that, after all, is what they’re there for – entertainment, diversion, understanding, truth. This weekend I marathoned all the “Toy Story” movies. Can you believe I’d never seen them before – and I’m a Pixar fangirl. And then, when I had trouble sleeping that night, I pulled up “Finding Nemo” on my iPhone and let it help me drift off to slumber. Yes, I’m a childless adult with “Finding Nemo” and “WALL-E” on her phone. While they’re not a part of my childhood, they bring up the universal emotions from childhood. Regardless of age, they’re a reminder of what mattered then isn’t really so much different than what matters now. Love, laughter, loyalty and how lucky we are to have good friends pass through our lives.